How predictable are you?

(4 minute read) // (15 minute exploration)

Hi friend 👋🏾

I hope I’ve found you sat down, chilling somewhere, ready for some self-discovery.

It’s this energy or nothing. Everything else can wait.

Today we’ve found a smart, clever way to explore how predictable you are.

I’m joking. But also not really…

In adult terms, it can be understood as the self-consistency fallacy.

In childish terms, it’s what you get if ‘confirmation bias’ and ‘identity’ had a baby.

In summary, it’s the invisible power that has you existing in your very own Groundhog Day.

It’s where you do that thing

because you did that thing

so continue to choose that thing

then you rinse and repeat.

It relates to your dietary habits, career choices, how you show up in relationships, exercise routines, what you do with your hair, your coffee order etc….

[insert] anything you’d follow up with the phrase - “it’s what I’ve always done”.

So, let’s get into it.

I have a lesson, 3 questions and a dare for you.

[A LESSON]

Do you brush your teeth before or after eating breakfast?

This is one of those frivolous questions that I KNOW some of y’all will have strong opinions on.

It’s also a great example of the self-consistency fallacy at play which is when someone assumes that because they have consistently believed or behaved in a certain way in the past, their current belief or behaviour must be correct or justified.

This fallacy ignores the possibility that past beliefs or actions could have been mistaken or based on faulty reasoning 😬

Have you ever taken the time to weigh the pros and cons of brushing before vs after breakfast? Probably not.

But you're still convinced your way is the right way, right?… because… “It’s what you’ve always done”.

Now, your brushing preferences - not going to have a huuge impact on the way you live your life. But when this fallacy has you only applying for unfulfilling marketing roles, because that’s all you’ve known, or turning down a promotion because you’ve only ever worked with your current team, it becomes more of a problem.

It’s what will have you avoiding the tough (but necessary) conversations with your parents because you’ve never really talked about deep stuff, or still acting up to your ‘party animal’ title, even though you’d rather be at home binging The Bear under a blanket.

The role your past has played in shaping who you are today is undeniable. That isn’t in question. What we are putting under the microscope, is how many of your decisions today, are still being driven by what you did in the past.

When looking at comments and feedback from past SELFHOOD sessions, a fear that comes up a lot - is stagnancy, “I don’t want to be in the exact same place this time next year”. A fear we (i) know well.

And whilst we’re always here for an unexpected plot twist, the solution to stagnancy doesn’t always have to be those big drastic decisions e.g. quitting your job, moving abroad, dying your hair red (ironically all things I have done).

You can also switch up that stagnancy, and trade in that consistency, with a few mini-experiments right where you are.

We call it - still exploring.

[3 QUESTIONS]

1. What opportunities, ideas or people (👀) have you overlooked recently because they strayed from what was familiar in the past?

2. Take a look at your life today, think about the life you want tomorrow (e.g. 6 months from now). What needs to change?

   Where could you trade consistency, for a little bit of courage?

3. If you were to start shaking things up this month - what immediately comes to mind?

   And if you have given this some serious reflection and are still struggling, here - I’ve made you a list of 25 examples.

[A DARE]

I dare you to do it. ‘It’ being, whatever your answer was to the question above.

Conduct your very own anti-consistency experiment.

You won’t be alone in it.

I’ll be experimenting with my teeth-brushing routine.

(I’m joking).

I’ve actually been experimenting these last 3 weeks - specifically with my exercise routine (I tried reformer pilates and have been mixing in more HIIT workouts). I was strictly a running and mat pilates girly.

And with my food, I’ve traded in the trusty Chilli and fajitas, for a range of different Pinterest-inspired nourish bowls.

I’m living in my very own cooking show. I love it.

So what experiment are you considering? I’d love to know!

Just hit reply and make my day 🙂 (I read every response).

See you on a Sunday.

L

P.S If a friend forwarded this to you, stop creeping in the shadows and come and join us.

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